If you have a BMI over 25, you will not like this blog...nor me if you read it. That being said, just because you don't like it, it doesn't make it untrue or wrong...and I'm not here to make friends.
In 2005 I started an organization called Keep It Simple. Originally it was a retail based company which had an affiliated business agreement to market health and wellness products through a distributorship owned by my family.
My end of the business originally specifically targeted athletes. Somewhere along the way, I realized that athletes didn't need help.
The people who were struggling were the non-athletic overweight population of middle America.
Frankly, these people pissed me off.
I continually received inquiries about which product would help these people lose weight.
Could I help them "quick start" a weight loss program.
Truth?
Yes. I could.
I could sell products and they would buy them and as long as they lost a pound or two, they would keep coming back.
It wasn't enough for me.
I didn't want to sell them a product.
I wanted to open their eyes.
I also knew it would be a tough sell.
Who the hell would listen to me about the struggles of being overweight?
At the time, I was 122 pounds and trying to gain weight.
Marketing.
"...A picture is worth a thousand words..."
I posted a picture of me as a "not so tiny" person.
I wasn't some Barbie who had never struggled.
I knew where they were and knew all the excuses.
I was a size 6 who went to a size 16 within 6 months.
It took a pretty short time at size 16 to realize something needed to change.
(Honestly, I am surprised it took me 6 months to realize I had grown so fast.)
I took a long and difficult look at my lifestyle and the choices I was making and smacked the crap out of myself.
There wasn't the same product hell available to me at the time that there is now for people who are looking for a quick fix, so I needed to actually change my eating habits.
A diet wouldn't work.
So I did it. I was a size 10 in six months and a size 6 a year later.
A size 4 six months after that.
I ate a lot. Multiple times a day.
...but I didn't eat crap.
I wasn't a vegetarian or vegan.
I didn't grab a tambourine and a candle and start growing my own produce.
I simply stopped buying into marketing.
Here's a tip, "Value Menu" or "Drive-thru" equals fat ass, stinky gas and bad skin.
If it needs butter, cheese, or ketchup to make it taste better, don't eat it.
Pork rinds are not on any food pyramid...even the really outdated ones.
...as a matter of fact, I challenge you to find any doctor or nutritionist who will tell you that frying food is good for you.
When I moved to the Midwest, I realized that they take fried food to a whole other level.
Deep-fried turkey? Really?
Deep fried Twinkies?
Is that a joke?
Hey, I'm not slamming the Midwest, lord knows the South has WAY more fried food...
But, come on. Healthy eating is still somewhat nouveau and chic out here.
I was told that I was too "in your face" with the whole weight loss thing and that no one wants to be told they are overweight.
No. I agree. They don't.
Not saying it doesn't make it not true.
Obesity is not the Boogie Man.
It's there in your face.
It's there sitting on your lap when you are naked on the toilet.
Believe.
...or at least open your eyes.
It's there. Fucking with you.
More importantly, it's there fucking with your health.
It's there fueling an industry just waiting to pry on your self loathing and poor self image.
I severed ties with the retail side of my family's company and became strictly an advocate for women's wellness.
I started educating women on the cancerous risks of being overweight.
I offered a buddy system to go out with them to kick-start their physical program and keep them motivated.
Ty started a group that sought to educate kids on making healthier choices and provided other options for those not interested in team sports.
We had volunteers speak to kids about cycling, running, hiking, and climbing...
Regardless, people, the adult people always wanted the quick fix.
OK.
You want it?
Here it is.
Lean in.
A little closer...
....closer...
*flicks reader on head through laptop screen*
THERE.
IS.
NO.
QUICK.
FIX!!!!!
...but...
It is really simple.
Seriously.
You MUST watch what you eat and make wise choices.
You should take a moment to research what it is you are putting into your body.
Generally, if you can't pronounce it, you either:
- (A) shouldn't ingest it, or
- (B) should Google the motherfucker to make sure it isn't going to kill you/make you fat.
If that means parking the car 10 spots farther away from the door or simply shagging your spouse, do something that does not involve a remote.
I watched over the past few years as boat loads of people jumped on the Atkins bandwagon the way they suddenly supported the Rams when they had a shot at the Super Bowl in 2000.
Hey, if it seems too good to be true, even if it works for a short while, it probably is too good to be true.
Then again, what do I know?
I'm just a former fat chic who managed to stay a size 4 for over 10 years without giving up carbs, wine, or having to eat copious amounts of decomposing flesh.
*ducks bottles of AB products, handfuls of provel "cheese", and toasted raviolis thrown at her by angry fatties in denial*
C'mon now. I'm not saying that every ass needs to be in a bike saddle, but for Pete's sake, make a friggin' change that wasn't commercially marketed to you and is of your own free will and stop making excuses.
Chances are, it isn't those pants or your hormones making you look fat...it's your actual fat making you look fat. It is for me.
...and believe me, I have NO excuse.
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