PSA: Pubes & Pee

You would think that this should not have to be stated, but ummmmmm, clearly it does.

OK...look...I accept the fact that there are still people walking around with pubes.

I am not sure why...and I do not ask...but I accept it.

I don't want to see that situation and I don't want to know about it, but I accept it.

That being said, if you are a person who has chosen not to pubescape, may I adamantly request the following...?

Please look at the toilet seat before you leave that area.

If you notice that one of those less-than-adorable little curly fellas has been left behind, please wipe it/them off the seat.

I know it may seem as though I am not a "team player", but I really do not feel that cleaning up someone else's pubes should ever be the responsibility of another person.

*gag*

It is a toilet seat. It is not supposed to look like a Chia pet.

Wipe that shit up.

The same goes for pee.

Seriously.

If you are a dude, shake that nonsense off like a pro, not like a tweaking 2 year old.

If you are a chick, there is really no excuse for drips on the seat.

Hover your junk over the bowl, sistas.

Then wipe...while still over the bowl.

Don't do a goddamned dance over the thing to get every last drop out. You could hurt yourself...and make a hot mess.

That should just about cover it.

I would like to personally thank that hairy assclown who inspired this blog for completely triggering my gag reflex this morning, thus ensuring that I am in no danger of adding holiday weight today.

*2 entirely snarky thumbs up*